My Body My Choice

My grandmother once told me that the abuses that I experienced as a child were things that just happened to women. Which now that I am older that sounds really fucked up, especially to tell a child between the ages of eight and nine. Lately in all the conversations I have had and the news. I am finding out this is true that we as women live in a world dominated by men (I mean I already knew this). Our bodies are not our own. If this election has proved anything it is that we already knew the truth. There will always be discrimination and a fight for equality. Though now it has become even ok for men to publicly speak about violating women.

From the beginning we are taught that we are lesser than a man. That we are not equal in power. We are taught that we need men to protect us (damsels in distress), that men are necessary to our survival. We are taught what is appropriate in a society run by men. We are taught to stay in our place, heads down, legs crossed, and mouth shut. We are taught that no matter what job we hold that we do not deserve the same benefits that men get for the same job. We are taught that we are no longer children once we hit childbearing age, we must grow fast, and learn quick just to survive.

Certain traditions are completely fucked. Like when a heterosexual couple gets married and the dad give the daughter away to the husband it is a transfer of ownership. We are taught that we are property. We learn these things not just through life but through the media as well. In movies, tv, politics, and the news. As women we teach children the same jacked up values and then we are to act like we are strong because we survived hell. When many of us are desensitized to the abuse that happen to be our daily lives.

After hell we are looked at as damaged goods, as if we have no reason to be angry upset or hurt. How can you have faith in a world that carters mostly to the egos of a “Male Agenda”. The worst of it is that we as women believe that what we are taught is the only way.

Why is it that women are expected to carry protection? Like it is their appendage…………. wrap that shit up. There are so many hoops that we as women must jump through just to protect ourselves. Last time I checked I do not see any men offering to get a vasectomy or go to a doctor that is all up in their business. Men and other women tell us that we are wrong for the choices that we make concerning our bodies even in situations that men put us in.

Women are not allowed to have the same freedoms as men. We are held to a different standard. Especially in cases of abuse. There is always some reason why the women are wrong. Either their dress was to short or shirt had too much of a v. There is always some excuse they must be a tease, or they were asking for it. These women are demonized held accountable for things they did not deserve. If a woman takes matter into her hands because even though she may have asked for help (or if she did ask it may have made things worse) somehow it cannot be justified. The acts of the men go unpunished. A lot of these actions happen in a kill or be killed manner.

For example, Nicole Addimando, and Brittany Smith. Both women were victims of abuse, and both say they shot and killed their abusers in self-defense.